A month or so has gone by and the PMR is doing better, the job is coming along, my family is all healthy and happy and by all rights, I should be happy as a clam.  I don't have any major problems down the horizon so I should be looking at things with a glass half full attitude.  Unfortunately, that is not the case.  I don't know why, but I don't feel happy, I don't act happy, and I don't know what to do about it. I am going to speak to the Rheumy next week to see if this  is part of the side effects of the medication, so if it is, I can just ignore it.  If not, I need to find a way to get myself out of it!!  Is it part of turning Social Security age?  Maybe.

I know, I could force myself to start dating again!!!  That would probably depress me more.... since there are so many wackos out there.  Well, maybe not dating.......... but how about forcing myself to get out of the house on a regular basis.  I know I started a New Year's Resolution to do something fun at least once a week.  Didn't happen when I got sick and all I wanted to do is sleep.  Maybe it is time to start that.  I will see if that works!!

So it has been a week or so since the merge of the company and have realized that things are definitely going to change.  I am trying to be optimistic about it, but people around here are not optimistic which is fighting my optimism.  I want to believe that we will be around for a lot more years........ and we will!!!!!
Went back to the Rheumy Tuesday and he is going to put me on more Methotrexate as of today, depending on how my liver functions are.  Then after 6 weeks of that, he will start lowering my prednisone again.  The pain in my shoulders and  hips are a dull ache.  Just enough to not want to stand too long and not able to get too much done at home.  I try to do everything in small steps. (Step 1, seperate the laundry, step 2, put the seperate piles in baskets, step 3, bring the baskets to the door, step 4, get the detergent, etc and 1 basket outside to the laundry and put one load in, etc. etc. etc.)  It takes forever, but it finally gets done.  I have tried to get the cats to help, but they just lay there and watch!!!  After each step, I am ready for a nap!!!!

I am going to start this again and see how far I get.  It has been a tough week and I need to get it down in writing to get it out of my head. Now that we have merged with the new company, 11 more people were laid  off and I never though they would even pay attention to our little division.  They did, and it wasn't pretty.  It was scary.  We have spent the rest of this week learning all the new things involved with this new company.  Next week we will find out about our new benefits (or maybe lack of).  It really is depressing to think about all of this.  They did send us a small video about the effects of change and the steps you go through.  Well, I am still at depression.  A lot of good people were let go and most of them were in the age range of 55-65.  These people are going to have trouble finding a job and it just isn't fair.  Ah well!  I suppose we all need to prepare for this kind of thing.

The weekend is almost here and I will try to take my mind off all of this.

Great!!!!  That is how I am feeling!!  Yes, it is due to the raised steroids, but what a relief!  I have slept for hours and  hours at a time.  I have been able to do things that I wouldn't even consider 2 weeks ago.  It is wonderful.  I did lower the steroids a bit on Friday and I am still feeling great!  I think I am going to try to start exercising again.  There is no reason not to.  We have a recumbant bike here at work and tonight I will get on it for a while before I go home.

The weekend was pretty quiet.  I cleaned some closets, did some shopping and just did whatever I felt like doing at that moment. 

It has been a painful and expensive weekend.  Started with a toothache on Friday afternoon.  Suffered through it while I had both the hot water tank and living room fan replaced on Saturday.  Sunday was continuing with both Tropical Storm Isaac and the painful toothache.  Monday, went to the dentist who immediately sent me to the guy who did a very painful and expensive root canal!!!  Ugh!!!

So now I sit here at work with a sore mouth, and by the time all is said and done,$ 2000.00 poorer.

Agghhh!    7 lbs lighter though :-)

Good Morning!  Well, I am feeling a little better today.  Went to the Rheumatologist yesterday and he decided my pain was too bad to continue cutting back on the steroids.  He upped them, as a matter of fact, but only for a week.  He has also started me on some Rheumatism medication which takes about a month to really start working.  So now I am on another pill, plus I have to take folic acid along with the rheumatism medication.  Just call me the pill lady!!  But I did get a decent nights sleep last night with just one dosage of the upped steroid.  It felt really good!

Will this ever end??

The weekend was interesting.  The air conditioning man showed up at 5pm and installed the sensor so the water wouldn't overflow anymore.  He commented that it was an awful lot of water on the floor (I ran a big fan for 2 days to dry out the carpeting).  Well Saturday morning when I went to take a shower, I could not get any hot water!  Well, guess what!  It wasn't the air conditioner that overflowed... it was the hot water tank that broke.  So, it has been cold showers for the past 3 days.  Not to bad in Florida in the summer.  The water isn't that cold!!

I have a friend at work whose husband has been out of work for a couple of years, so he has started his own little fixit job.  After talking to Linda, he can come on Saturday and replace the tank.  I thought about getting one of the waterless ones, but it is only me and it is only one of those short stubby tanks.  I wouldn't be saving that much energy by getting a waterless one!  I know I will be taking cold showers all week, but if it will help my friend out.... I will wait a few days.  Plus, he is going to replace the ceiling fan in the living room that blew the circuit breaker when I turned it on a few months back.  I could use a fixit man at my house for a few weeks, I think!!!

So Saturday afternoon I decided to see if I could find a flapper for my commodes.  They are the old Standard brand and the normal flaps don't fit well. (Against what they all say on the outside of the package!)  It has to sit exactly straight, or it drips and drips and drips and then reloads the water again.  I had decided to go to a plumbing parts store and if he couldn't suggest anything I was just going to replace the whole commodes.  I am very tired of replacing the flappers every couple of weeks!  He suggested a retrofit of a bigger flapper and an additional rubber piece.  I thought, yeah, yeah....... this will work like all the others!!  Eureka!!!!!  It took about 2 minutes to install and it works perfectly!!!!  I could hug that wonderful man!  I am going back tonight to get another one for the other bathroom!!  I was my own Mr fixit on that one!!!